It is purely frustrating to realise that we are define by the opputunities both; the ones we have grabbed with both our hands and the ones we have let gone off.

I would rank up high there, with letting tons of oppurtunities just fly me by especially when it hits you late in your life that you should have done that. What also hurts is that while you are sititng and obviously annoyed at the lack of oppurtunitites that come your way(partly y fault for letting so man go), you see complete imbeciles get your dream job, or see them living your dream life, just becuase they have the money and the contacts!!

ARGHH!! It is purely vent, a feeling that has come full circle if I go by the first post that I worte since I came here. I guess This country is done and time to move on accpet the truth like a mature, grown up, level headed person should.

But the impulsive and ultra sensitive and prone ot depression soul within me might not get over that so easily!

C'est La Vie

The Question

And all at once

I knew at once

I knew he needed me.

Until the say I die I wonder why

I knew he needed me

It could be fantasy or maybe it's because...

He needs me

He needs me

He needs me

He needs me

He needs me

He needs me!

I first came across these lyrics as they played in the background of an advertisment for a product I can't seem to recall. But from the entire ad, what I have remembered are these lyrics, short and simple they may be, but they somewhow touched on the early notions of the beginnings of love that a woman(really do not picture a man thinking aloud these thoughts) would start to experience in her courtship. Dresses in white, watching comically as her husband begins to rush around the house, searching for his his mobile, car keys, briefcase, documents and blah.

Throughout his frantic search, she calmy points out all the paraphernalia that needs for his office with a serene look and a mona lisa smile on her face.

All this while, these words just flow on in the ad film and well.. this whole frame just remained as a mental movie in my mind. The song drove me crazy because I couldn't find it anywhere.

Sort of like finding love. We all have these notions of What love is like, the feeling of being in love and being loved back in return by the one we want and desire. To each to its own.

I waited, searched, forgot, looked, found it and lost it with a blink of an eye, fell for a lie, took a leap of faith, rose against society and brains, wanted it, got it, but didn't know what do to with it, dreamt of it all, just in the name of LOVE.

Maybe, this could be interpreted as a sign, as an understanding, that you will eventually achieve it.

As a wise man once said,

Ask, and you will be given.

Seek and you will find

- Matthew 7:7

ALL I am saying is "There is someone out there, who is also doing his best to get to you as fast as poosible so that you too can some day, hum those lyrics in your head and also wonder how you knew he/she needed you"

Cheers and good luck!

Forgive and Forget?

When you are in a realtionship... friends or otherwise, when it ends on a bad note, when is it the appropriate time to talk to them again?

I mean in this day and age of six degrees of seperation, there is bound to someone soul who through no fault of his own is going to be in the same circle as a person from your past. 

What are you supposed to do then?

I mean is the right thing in this day and age to forgive and forget that person's indescretion. Just remember all the good times and forget the muck.

I am the kind who does forgive, but I don't forget, or rather I can't forget. So, I always maintained that rule when ending any relationship, it works well.. for me atleast.

But, then, I see people around hanging out and mingling socially with people they swore were the worst of mankind everywhere.

So, does that mean they have forgiven and forgotten their black deeds?

Does that make me a stubborn person who sticks to their iron resolute and refuses to always look back to her past, prefering to be alone than even consider the idea of picking up the phone or even adding them on FB.

Or does that make me stupid?

Can you ever forgive and forget a person?

forgive maybe, but forget???

How does that work?

Say you have forgiven the person for their fault? But could actually ever forget the mistake they had committed.

How much deep in love would you have to be to have your eyes closed to everything they did.

Can anyone truly forgive and forget?

 

Another day, another book, another library

I have a literature review submission, 3000 words (I have two words so far, "Literarute Review") and the deadline is 9.30 am on Monday, 16th of February 2009.

Now, never having ever in my life forced to against my will, write something that I really didn't believe in or even show the remotest inclination for, I find really hard to forget even feigning interest. It is just plain torture, having to read score and scores of scoholar written by some frustrated prick, who you know did it just so he could one day put you down and make you feel like a complete dumb when you picked his books up from those shleves full of intimidating names and book covers.

As if, the pretencious cover, along with the font and the 'fabulous must read for every one interested in this____ field, you have these thoughtful souls that decided to complicate things by underlining some lines in the text.

There you are, this poor, naive soul, student... picking up the book, based on instinct or on the classmark of your list. You open the book with some hope, hoping, that it be easy to read and understand and some hopefully with some pictures or atleast with some funny underlining in the text. My y how gullible are we???

There you are, stuck with this tome, wondering , why and what made you choose this topic. A sudden inflaming of overriding recognition and connection doesn't necessarily always have to translate into something that would last you a good 7 months or so... tch tch

The underlined texts are of course the ones your eye catches and your brain goes into overdrive and starts reading it outloud, praying taht , you just got your summary.

Well, 99% that text was underlined just so you would read it. there is absolutely nothing in that text that is in anyway boad or narrowly related to your topic!

Just wanted to make a point here, things at first glance, aren't the things you are searching for to derive some meaning from it.

123

"I went to Tesco's that day, and bought this bottle of wine. The cashier at the till, he didn't ask for my age proof. I look old." - She is 25 years old, and she lives opposite me.

"When I went to Tesco one evening, the cashier at the till asked for idetification because, well; a I was buying a bottle of wine. All the three employees present there started to have a discussion whether they should let me buy the bottle because I didn't have any id with me at that time.Two of them thought that I was underage and the emaingin one thought I was above the 21 age limit,. I am 24, and they thought I was below 21, I mean that is so hilarious!. - She is a room-mate.

Everyone has their own take on life's jokes