Save Me

I felt I was drowning in the vast and deep ocean of my thoughts which were God alone knows connected to what and to whom.Considering the previous entry which mentioned the problem of over thinking, I felt pretty stupid, so like I had suggested, I stopped thinking and well... it worked. And now i thought it would be nice if i shared this wonderful song with whoever is actually reading this tripe, but its a good song, strikes a chord within you. Its by Jem and called "save Me"


Save me save me save me wooh
I've gotta stop my mind
Working overtime
It's driving me insane
It will not let me live
Always so negative
It's become my enemy
Save me ah ah save me ah ah
save me ah wooh
Save me ah ah save me ah ah
save me ah wooh
Why would I think such things
Crazy thoughts have quick wings
Gaining momentum fast
One minute I am fine
The next I've lost my mind
To a fake fantasy
And none of these thoughts are real
So why is it that I feel
So cut up and so bad
I need to take control
Coz my mind is on a roll
And it isn't listening to me
Save me ah ah save me ah ah
save me ah wooh[thinking and thinking]
Save me ah ah save me ah ah
save me ah wooh[thinking and thinking]
Mirror mirror on the wall
Who's the dumbest of them all
Insecurities keep growing
Wasted energies are flowing
Anger, pain and sadness beckon
Panic sets in in a second
Be aware it's just your mind
And you can stop it anytime
Save me ah ah save me ah ahsave me ah wooh[thinking and thinking]
Save me ah ah save me ah ahsave me ah wooh[thinking and thinking]
Ok so here we go
If it works I'll let you know
One two three I say stop

From the Town of Boredom - Population:1

"I'm the fortune's fool"

I'm mind f-ed since yesterday for reasons unknown to me. Nothing Tragic actually happened, wasn't denied anything mind numbingly important which would have shook the very foundations ( which are very weak now a days) of my bleak present life. Then why was I getting mind fucked? All things bright and beautiful were being sucked into a black hole, and all i could do was just stand and stare at what was transpiring.
When you are bored, ( being mind fucked, eventually sooner or later leads the "chosen one" to the wonderful town of boredom) everything loses its appeal, the magic as we grudgingly accept is gone.
Eg. the tiles in my bathroom are very colourful. Now when I'm happy i see the glow of yellow, the vividness of the colour red clashing with the clamness of blue but agreeing with the soothing effect of the green. Now, when i m mind f-ed i just stare at it, acquicesed to its existence in my life.

P.S. Anyone and Everyone is welcome to the town of boredom. there is no permission or visa stamp required.

Just a Ride ??? ?????

Our lives are a lot like the lift rides we take. Just as the Great Jagger says “you can’t always get what you want” in life. You never somehow always get your desired lift, the one which is relatively empty, with just enough people but, still plenty of breathing space and you go directly to your desired floor.

Alas!!! If it were only so easy.

Life like I have said before is very similar to a lift ride. You have your ups and downs ( pun unintended) , unscheduled and often surprising or usually aggravating stops which make you question the entire f-ing life cycle, the occasional recreational halts( I breathe a sigh of release at these stops, and thank the lord and karma for them). But the worst stop occurs when, you are stuck in the rut, the buzz in your life is gone (as in case of the lift, the electricity is gone). If you have noticed, this stop loves you a lot when you are above the age of 18 and there suddenly a lot more floors you can go to.

Whatever be the case, we are always waiting in the lobby of the world, in our given time, hoping against hope for that arrow to be shown in our favour.

Astrologers and palmists are of the opinion that the palms of our hands with those crooked or straight lines are very symbolic. (Go figure). The left one indicates the stuff (destiny or fate, I don’t know the difference. The dictionary just confused me) that we were born to fulfill and the right one the indicates our karma.

Now, I may not guarantee the complete fulfillment of destiny or fate (I need to know the difference), but I can assure you one thing, earning karma is not that difficult. Once you start believing in it, and understanding it, it becomes very easy. Life somehow seems a bit brighter, everything seems a bit brighter. It works both ways and it rocks. Trust, karma works when and where everything else fails.

Think About It

Think About It 1^st of November 2006

It’s about 12.45 am in the morning. Sleep seems to evade me as I lay in my bed, my head resting on the pillow at a very awkward and a rather painful position (because I’d put cream in ears) which is putting a strain on my neck.( I think this is where the term, ‘ a pain in the neck’ originated from. The author too must be in this position to say something like this). My mind surprisingly is keen on wandering into the “gosh where did this come from” category of thoughts. So… like I am, I let it. Can’t sleep might as well have some form of entertainment right!!

Staring at the ceiling, by the glow of the stars I had stuck on it, I see the mundane vision of my current bleak present. I wished or rather thought that how good would it feel if the ceiling collapsed and smashed my head into smithereens. (I know dark morbid thoughts, but just go with the flow please)

Then it suddenly struck me, why should I be thinking of such thoughts. Life was pretty pleasant; vacations going on, high in studies and college life, friends are still there? Then why was I thinking of thoughts of such painful ilk.

Why do we keep on putting ourselves in such aggravating and mind f-ing positions which definitely and always test out levels of patience (that too not kindly enough). Please don’t tell me it helps in building character, I know it does but there has to be some other way, much better than what we make ourselves go through.

Why??? Why do we think so much? Why have we stopped listening to our hearts or even stopped acting on our instincts. Do you even remember the last time you listened to your intuition?

We waste so much precious time thinking over minute irrelevant problems which don’t even affect us that much and even more time over the complex ones which we wish would just disappear.( like those witches do, their problems just disappear in a puff of smoke. Damn I should have been a witch). We think about FOOD (that’s justifiable, its food), friends, love, death, taxes…. The list just goes on and on and on.

After deep pondering, delving into the deep recess of the human mind where no man has gone before (I always wanted to say that), I’ll tell you why we think so much; because when we stop thinking for just a moment and just go with the flow, with no seconds thoughts and do that one act totally on instinct or because we want to do it, it feels so good.

Society Demands & We Accept

Society Demands & We Accept 25^th October 2006

I write about it with deep contempt in my mind and heart. My immense dislike for it stems from the various events which I have been fortunate or unfortunate to witness in its name. Maybe in the years gone by it was innocent, true even pure and often associated with bliss or say even craziness and madness of the first order.

Now it seems to me, it is commercialized, an opportunity for obtaining revenge or experiencing for the sake of it, deflowering it of its true pure meaning, or because society demands it and we accept it.

I have no trust or faith in it. But someone told me during those rare moments of emotional breakdowns (during exams especially). She said, “I’m not worried for you nor should you be. For, in the near future (??) you will fall and start to believe in it when you are ready for it. I just know it”.

When that day arrives, I will look towards HIM and say or rather sarcastically ask one of the following phrases

• Why???!!!
• You have got to be kidding me!!!
• You, karma and the various constituents of the universe are conspiring against me!!!

There could also be other relevant and perhaps witty and sarcastic comments to be said, but I wouldn’t know because my mind or rather my brain at that point (being in love and all that) would be royally and definitely muddled up and confused beyond recognition.

“Love will come its just waiting for me and for you”.

Scary isn’t it??

Oh my; I need all my good karma.

Author’s note- this little note is based on true events and my attitude towards love is based on all the samples that I have seen and personally heard about. Don’t you dare judge me.